|Cartoon obtained from this website.|
Where do they go? What celestial vortex opens up in washing machines and dryers and sucks out individual socks? And for what possible purpose? Are the sprites who steal our socks one-at-a-time malevolent or merely mischievous?
Inquiring minds want to know.
Heck, even the members of our crack research staff (surely the least inquisitive minds on the planet) want to know.
But we can't find out where the lost socks go, much less why, and on Thursday, Lost Sock Memorial Day, we can only reflect and recollect.
How's that for an absolutely silly microminiholidayette?
Still, there's not a lot to choose from on Thursday. It will be the 153rd birthday of J.M. Barrie, the creator of Peter Pan. There was a great deal to be found in Neverland, but not our lost socks.
Piano Man Billy Joel turns 64 on May 9. Louis Armstrong was 63 on May 9, 1964 when his recording of "Hello Dolly" temporarily dislodged the Beatles from the #1 spot on America's pop charts.
Former Chicago Mayor Anton J. Cermak was born on May 9, 1873. It was Cermak's death that secured his place in American history: Cermak was gunned down in Miami, Florida on February 15, 1933 while shaking hands with President-Elect Franklin D. Roosevelt (Cermak would die on March 6). The linked Wikipedia article recounts the story that assassin Giuseppe Zangara was shooting at FDR, only to have his aim spoiled when Lillian Cross, a doctor's wife, hit Zangara's elbow with her purse. Of course, in Chicago, there's always been some question as to whether Cermak was the intended target all along....